Directory of Lost Causes (By Quentin S. Crisp)

Not playing the piano is my hobby

I forget who it was - Grayling or Dawkins or one of those clones - came up with what he thought was a very clever and witty comeback to the accusation that atheism is just another religion. "If atheism is a religion," he said, "then not playing the piano is a hobby."

Obviously he didn't realise that he was not only failing to be clever and refute the charge, but he was showing exactly what a ridiculous religion atheism is.

Let's run through this shall we?

'atheism' is to 'belief' as 'not playing the piano' is to 'hobby'. Therefore this:

A: "What do you believe in?"

B: "I'm an atheist."

Is the same as this:

A: "What are your hobbies?"

B: "My hobby is that I don't play the piano."

To put it simply, calling yourself an atheist is the same as considering not playing the piano to be your hobby.

Labels: atheism, pianos